I’ve always felt that action movies can be measured by the villain. Die Hard rode the performance of Alan Rickman as cynical terrorist Hans Grueber. Batman was fueled by the maniacal Joker, and the crushing tension in Silence of the Lambs was fed by the evil presence of Hannibal Lector.
That’s great for action movies. But what about comedies?
I think a similar principle is at work for comedies. Instead of villains though, a great comedy requires a great asshole—not a true villain—but a person who is so instantly dislikable, that we don’t mind when they are tormented the rest of the movie.
So, without further ado, Badmouth introduces: The Top Five Movie Assholes.
5. William Atherton
Reasons to hate him: Ghostbusters, Real Genius, Die Hard
“Everything was fine, until dickless here cut off the power grid!”
“Is that true?”
“Yes, Your Honor, this man has no dick.”
Whether he is playing a dickless EPA inspector in Ghostbusters, a dickhead arms-dealer/college professor in Real Genius or a dickwad news reporter in Die Hard, William Atherton is the dick we can’t do without. There are few joys in the world equal to watching him get torn down by Bill Murray in Ghostbusters or punched in the face by Bonnie Bedelia at the end of Die Hard.
4. Paul Gleason
Reasons to hate him: The Breakfast Club, Die Hard
“Don’t mess with the bull, young man. You’ll get the horns.”
In a rare show of solidarity, students and teachers have agreed on one topic: They both hate school administrators.
Paul Gleason is probably why it’s still considered OK to loath the hardworking administrators of America. His portrayal of Principal Richard Vernon in The Breakfast Club. Set new a new standard for how unlikable a high-school administrator could be. He followed that tour de force performance with a supporting asshole role in the Bruce Willis action picture Die Hard.
3.Gary Cole
Reasons to hate him: Office Space
“Hello Peter. What’s happening? Um, I’m gonna need you go ahead and come in tomorrow. So if you could be here around nine, that would be great. Oh, oh, I forgot. I’m gonna also need you to come in Sunday too. We, uh, lost some people this week and we need to sorta catch up. Thanks.”
In today’s lightened age we’ve moved past the old stereotype of the boss as dictator: brow-beating, autocratic and loud. But that does not mean that the boss is no longer the enemy. Gary Cole’s smarmy, arrogant Satan-spawned upper-manager Bill Lumbergh redefined the hated boss for the new generation. Oily, non-confrontational and completely oblivious, Cole created the template that all future hated bosses will be based on.
2.Paul Giamatti
Reasons to hate him: Private Parts
“Yes, you know about this? I was in the program director’s office…his name is Pig-Vomit. Yes, ’cause he looks like a pig and makes you want to vomit. Pig-Vomit! Anyways, Pig-Vomit says to me, this is not WNBC. It’s WNNNNBC! WNNNNNBC! And I was not saying the call letters right. It’s a big problem.”
Paul Giamatti is currently wowing critics with his performance as world-class crank Harvey Pekar in American Splendor, but he put himself on the map with his performance as world-class asshole Kenny “Pig Vomit” Rushton in Howard Stern’s Private Parts. In turns, slimy, condescending, arrogant, sycophantic and mean; Giamatti produced a character so dislikable, Stern actually looked good in comparison. That’s impressive.
1.Ted Knight
Reasons to hate him: Caddyshack
“I’ve sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn’t want to do it. I felt I owed it to them.”
Primarily known for hiw work on The Mary Tyler Moore Show, Ted Knight staked out a place in cinematic history when he created the most memorable movie asshole of all time: Judge Smails in Caddyshack. Knight’s perfomance was so over the top, that he regularly stole scenes from costars Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield and Bill Murray. Knight’s unending supplies of arrogance, condensation and impotent rage propelled the vague fragments of a plot along, and provided all the major characters with a worthy nemisis.
So hats off to the late, great Ted Knight – the asshole to end all assholes.
Honorable Mention
Bill Murray — Kingpin
Bill Paxton — Weird Science
Mark Metcalf — Animal House
Jeffrey Jones – Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
Think I missed a fantastic asshole? Leave a comment below.
Tags: Gary Cole, Paul Giamatti, Paul Gleason, Ted Knight, William Atherton
Mr. Rooney from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off!!!
What about Bryan Brown (Cocktail)? I hated him.
Don’t forget Gary Cole in “One-Hour Photo” – where he played Robin Williams’ boss. Another great boss-asshole role.
Great pick for #1. A few other “honorable mentions:”
-Hedly Lamar, “Blazing Saddles”
-Chief Inspector Dreyfus, The Pink Panther movies
-Mr. Hand, “Fast Times at Ridgemont High”
-The guy who played the sergeant in “Good Morning Vietnam”
Excelent choices as top 5. Just perfect, all of them. I always love the guy you love to hate. One more for honorable mention, Jeremy Piven for his outstanding work as Dean Pritchard in Old School. He was a total asshole.
More honorable mention: Bradley Whitford: the pompous ass brother in Billy Madison, the two-timing asshole boyfriend in Adventures in Babysitting, the head Alpha Beta in Revenge of the Nerds 2.
The sargeant (major) in GMV was the late great JT Walsh. His polka-playing co-asshole sidekick was Bruno Kirby.
John C. McGinley
What an asshole (onscreen)!
Point Break, Office Space, The Animal. Need I say more?
The titty bar owner in Kill Bill, Vol 2.
What about JACK NICHOLSON in a few good men?
Top Arsehole of all time i reckon!
Denzel Washington in “Training Day”
He is such an asshole all the way throughout the movie, but the end of the movie illistrates my point the best. I can’t put a lot of it up because of the severe language but here are some quotes:
“You disloyal, fool-ass, bitch-made punk.”
I’m the police! I run shit here; you just live here!”
King Kong ain’t got shit on me!”
Is it possible to find out if William Atherton is related to actor, Ted Atherton of SUE THOMAS F.B.I.? The two men look so much alike that I wondered if they were related. Are they brothers, father and son????
How could you possibly forget Jack Nicholson’s performance in Anger Mangement?
Joss Ackland, he played the villian in Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey, the South African Ambassodor in a Lethal Weapon 2 , the Soviet Ambassador in Crimson Tide. The guy just SCREAMS villian everywhere he is.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000722/
Another big time villian actor is Gary Oldman. You will rarely know who he is on screen. But he played Dracula, Zorg in the “Fifth Element”, the highjacker in “Air Force One”, he played Mason Verger (the wealthy infirmed child molester) in Hannibal, he also played Lee Harvey Oswald in JFK, etc…
While He has branched out into good guys with his recent Harry Potter effort, he’s the best villian in Hollywood.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000198/
Another emerging Asshole is Sam Rockwell. He’s also adept at playing really ANNOYING, IRRATATING assholes. He played the thieving partner in Matchstick Men, the double-crossing aggressive nephew in “Heist”, the prime villian in “Charlies’ Angels” and most notably Wild Bill in “The Green Mile”.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005377/
How about Ronny Cox from Total Recall and RoboCop and a few other titles.
I’d echo Jack Nicholson from “The Shining”, “A Few Good Men, “The Witches of Eastwick” and “Batman”.
How about Alan Rickman from “Harry Potter xxx”, “Galaxy Quest”, “Die Hard”, “Robin Hood”, and “Quigley Down Under”,
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005377/
Ice blooded advertising exec Edgar Price (played by actor Frank Langella) from the movie Sweet November. His role was brief, but brutal. I remember his withering put-down of a waitress reducing her to tears.
“You know something sweetheart, we are what we do in this world. Your job is simply to bring the food to and from the table. So when you screw up something as simple as that…that doesn’t say a hell of alot about you.”
I think you missed one of the up and coming real assholes of film. Vince Vaughn. Take “Swingers”, alright not too much of an asshole there, but he was a prick. Then there was the sort of sequal “Made”. He was a true assbag in this movie, wouldn’t shut up, always pissin people off, I was just waiting the whole movie for someone to open fire on his ass. There was “Clay Pigeons” where he plays a serial killer that acts like a nice guy. Yeah, he was a real dick in that one, breaking up couples and killin people. He always seems to play the pushy asshole friend in his other comedies too. He does have that certain endearing streak to him so I can see why you might not have considered him right off the bat.
Jason Patric in Your Friends and Neighbors
i have no clue about this site .. lol i waz a google and bad mouth site pooped up lol its a aweseome website.. HA! ( i think) well ttyl buh bi peazz outt
Billy Bob Thortons Character in Bad Santa. Big asshole.
Dwight Yokum’s Character in Sling Blade. Doyle. Huge Asshole.
u 4got Jim Kerry,
wot an asshole he is.
has ne1 seen at least 1 filmwhere he isnt being a complete prat?
H…mm
For sheer over the topness in assholedom – how about nutty terrorist Eric Qualen in Cliffhanger played by the wonderful John Lithgow.
Actually there is an ultimate ultimate asshole – Steven Segal’s secret service cook in Under Siege. Ok he’s supposed to be the hero but … you just know he’s going to massacre the terrorists from the first ten seconds of the film. Not only was Under Siege probably Steven Segal’s worst film in a long long career it was when he really started making some truly bad movies.